Steady.

I am here then I am not. I am focused. My needs are met. Broken now, I am still as the bone that binds us, stiller than the death that surrounds us. Into the night, the nightingale sings, foreign like a sword. I have eaten my scones, and drank my tea, and watched the world go by outside my window. But I am glad. Glad I have a house with a window, glad I have food, glad I have found a way to live the life I have always wanted. Shadows fade outside on the grass. A grasshopper jumps very high. Lunacy. The day is coming and I have to get ready. Tomorrow will be worse, or better, depending, but still I have a roof over my head, still I have eyes that see and ears that hear, still my lover comes to me. In the depths of the dawn, breathlessness comes, and I am steady.